If you saw the first Harry Potter movie you will know exactly what Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans are. Some of the most disgusting, repulsive and horrid flavors ever imaginable jam packed into a tiny little jelly bean. Of course this was a huge marketable item for the Potter franchise and who better to make them than the world renown leaders in jelly bean production, Jelly Belly. Yes, those overpriced beans that everyone loves to receive as gifts. We went through a rather trying time with Bertie Bott’s; the brood loved combining the flavors to make even more repulsive tastes. Suffice it to say, you haven’t lived until you’ve had a Booger and Trout flavor combination.

Jelly Belly Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans

What’s the big deal, they are just jelly beans? Well, if they were just jelly beans they wouldn’t have a huge price tag attached to them and they certainly wouldn’t still be in production. Sure, the 3.5 ounce ‘wizard bag’ isn’t as popular as it once was but it is still an incredible seller. The biggest thing to know about this is that you are only getting twenty select flavors with the pouch version. The last time I counted them up there were over 150 different flavors and when you get into combining them, well, the potential for flavor mixes is endless. The wizards pouch is nice but it isn’t anything that you are going to hang on to unless you are a huge Potter fan.

The 3.5 ounce wizard bags contain twenty flavors but you are not guaranteed to get each and every flavor in the bag; is that clever marketing or what? There is a small fold out on the flavors and it shows a photo of the Every Flavor Bean along with the name. Some of the colors of them are enough to turn your stomach but if you are brave enough to try them, well, I tip my wizards hat to you. The flavors are: Grape, Rotten Egg, Black Pepper, Cinnamon, Booger, Ear Wax, Buttered Popcorn, Earthworm, Grass, Lemon, Sardine, Soap, Bacon, Toasted Marshmallow, Green Apple, Tutti-Fruitti, Very Cherry, Vomit, Blueberry and Dirt.

What are the best and worst flavors? Sometimes you can’t go by just the name of something, the Butter Popcorn wasn’t any real shock since that is one of the old school Jelly Belly flavors. The Lemon, Cinnamon, Blueberry, Tutti-Fruitti and Toasted Marshmallow are the normal run of the mill jelly bean flavors; the true taste is there but they are all a little overly sweet. Green Apple is tart but with a pleasant aftertaste to it, Grass tastes like a mix between lime and some type of industrial hand soap you wash your hands with in a public bathroom and Earthworm tastes like cocoa but very gritty. The brood said it tasted completely different to them so every person is going to have a different “taste interpretation” of them.

If the myriad of flavors in the 3.5 ounce bag is too much for you, you can get this in dedicated flavor selections like the ten flavor pack that includes Boogers, Rotten Egg, Earwax, Dirt and Sardine. Getting them in this format allows you to know what flavors you are actually consuming thanks to the little flavor guide that comes with it. If you want to experience every single flavor, well you are going to have to spend about $49.99 and get the massive four pound container of Bertie Bott’s but the upside is you do get a complete color guide to all the flavors. Some of those include Salmon, Brussel Sprouts, Centipede, Sushi, Worcestershire Sauce, Paprika, Baked Beans, Curry, Frog Legs, Sand, Onion, Toe Nails and Squid. If you want to get the newest flavors you will have to settle for the smaller 1.6 ounce boxes since they are the newest off the production line.

The Bottom Line

So the Bertie Bott’s are too tame for you? Then perhaps you need to check out some of the other gross Potter offerings. Here are some of the Harry Potter candies that are still in production; “Chocolate Frogs”, “Blood Pops”, “Cockroach Clusters’, ‘Acid Pops”, “Jelly Slugs”, “Fizzing Whizbees”, “Cotton Candy Bubble Gum”. The real appeal to the Bertie Bott’s is that there is an unending combination of flavors that you can make with them. If you can get past the flavors on a solo level then you should be able to handle any combination. I was the human guinea pig for several of the broods taste experiments and suffered through it for the sake of science, well, at least that is what they conned in into thinking.

Step 1: Start with a plastic cauldron or any large round surface and cover it just over halfway with aluminum foil. Tape the foil to the cauldron or round surface with masking tape. Then use watered down wood glue and full paper sheets, you can use an old phone book or any news paper laying around.

Put about 6-7 layers of paper and glue over the top half. When that’s all dry, pull or cut it off. Draw the face you want on the pumpkin with a marker, and then cut it out with some snips.

Step 2: Then start making the other half of the pumpkin using the same technique. When the second half is dry, pull or cut it off then tape it to the other half. Apply paper and glue to the seam a couple of times and let it dry.

**Note** Make sure to cut a hole in the bottom of the pumpkin so you can access the inside of it.

Step 3: Apply a couple layers of paper and glue INSIDE the pumpkin for extra strenght.

Step 4: Take a 2 foot length of 14 gauge wire and poke one end of the wire through the top of the pumpkin and bend it around a couple of times so that it won’t come out. Then twist some newspaper around it to make the stem. Use some wood glue and smear it on and into the twists of the stem to keep it in place.

Step 5: After the glue is dry, coat the entire pumpkin with a couple of coats of latex paint. You can buy this at any home renovation store, or walmart. If possible, buy a dark color, either dark grey or black. Most places will tint paint for you.

Step 6: Use paper towel to make the wrinkles and texture. Paint the latex onto the paper towels with a brush on an old plate, then drap the paper towel over the pumpkin and kind of wrinkle and squish it around until you get the texture how you want it. Let it dry

**Note** It’s best if you use half sized sheets of one ply paper towel.

Step 7: When you’re satisfied with the look, coat the whole thing with another 2 layers of latex paint, inside and out. Let it dry.

Step 9: Paint two thin layers of orange acrylic craft paint to the outside of the pumpkin. The black paint should still showed through. Let it dry. Then you can dry brush the pumpkin with some dark brown acrylic craft paint.

Step 10: Use the same dark brown acrylic craft paint and paint the entire stem. Then use some olive-greenish paint to dry brush on top of the brown stem once it dries. You can also dry brush some black on the stem. The dry brushing will give the pumpkin a realistic rotten look.

**Note** You may want to seal your pumkin to have it last longer, especially if it’s humid where you live.

The most important thing to remember is to have fun! I’d like to give a big thanks to PerfessorEvil and Ghostess Deanna for these wonderful photos of the process!