How To Be A Trekkie, Or In Vulcanese; Uf Kup Nam-Tor “Trekkie”

Posted in Halloween on January 18th, 2010 by Helfyre

If you are a new Trek fan, or already a fan and in need of a revival, this is the guide for you! Follow the steps and fully immerse yourself in the wonderful world that is Star Trek.

  1. Watch The Original Series. These are still aired on TV on some channels, though it would be best to watch them on DVD as to see them in order. Remember, the special effects are bad because it started as a low-budget show back in late 1966. There were three seasons of TOS (The Original Series). All three seasons can be found for free at the cbs website under “classic shows”.
  2. Watch The Next Generation. Once again, watching them on DVD is best, so you can see them in order. There are 178 episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation.
  3. Watch the movies, Star Trek I-VI (1-6), Generations, First Contact, Insurrection, Nemesis, and the newest Star Trek movie. Even if you do not agree with the new movie, it still bears the label of Star Trek, even if it is a RU889061-01non-canon story.
  4. Read the books! They are still being published and there are hundreds to choose from. Maybe at first just focus on the books to accompany your favourite series. To consider yourself a true Trek fan and not a ‘dabbler’, you must have read some books.
  5. Review your knowledge. Make sure you know the technology, as well as the ships. At least know how a warp core works.
  6. Continue watching the spinoffs. Deep Space 9, Voyager, and Enterprise. Be sure to pay attention to technology, terms, creatures, and characters.
  7. Look on eBay or similar sites for The Star Trek Encyclopedia. This contains detailed information on STV ,TOS, TNG, and DS9, as well as the movies. It is the Star Trek BIBLE. And if you’re going to be a fully fledged Trek fan you’re gonna need a reference book, for those times in the middle of the night when you absolutely NEED to go check what episode a certain ship was in, or what year Harry Kim was born.
  8. Learn more about the Star Trek universe by reading Memory Alpha, a wiki dedicated to Star Trek. It has more info than the ecnyclopedia as it is constantly updated as new information is created. You’ll need it if you want your knowledge to extend further than Voyager’s fifth season.
  9. GET A UNIFORM. This is a must. All real fans have uniforms. They are increasingly hard to find nowadays – you’ll need to try costume sites and eBay and be prepared to pay for shipping. (Do not fret – there is a new line of costumes soon to be realeased with the new movie in 2009)
  10. WATCH IT. READ IT. LOVE IT.
  11. LEARN TREKNO-BABBLE! Trekno-babble is the fast “techno-babble” conversation that people on Star Trek always have that only a true trekkie could understand. You will be expected not to get lost just because they talk about all this future stuff.
  12. YOU MUST LEARN TREKKIE SLANG!! Trekno-babble, series abbreviations like STV,TOS and TNG, and stuff like that are musts. It would be so un-trek like of you to say, “I got lost in all that high future stuff talk.” Instead say, “The trekno-babble threw me off.”
  13. Be smart and say long run on sentences like Data. Also, learn stardates. That way, if someone asks “when is the movie opening”, you can wierd ‘em out by telling ‘em the stardate. A good place to learn about a common version of stardates is freewebs.com/savethetrekkies.
  14. YOU MUST GET INTO THE HABIT OF saying universe instead of world. Like instead of saying you’re the best mom in the world say you’re the best mom in the universe!
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